Nappies. The stench. Dear God, the stench.

  Like little bags of evil, nappies could make a sewage farm worker gag at a 100 paces. There’s no way round it just breathe through the mouth and mentally take yourself away to your happy place or try and name the Mexico ‘86 England team. Anything to distract you from the fact you are…

Birth. It’s fucking terrifying.

I won’t lie to you. Whether it’s natural or caesarean, the whole birth thing is fucking terrifying. As a dad, you’ll find that you are largely surplus to requirement throughout this whole horrific process and your best bet is to stay out of the way as much as possible. Don’t get me wrong, everyone’s very…